I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
barbara walters just said penis...
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
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