peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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