Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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