Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Randomize