I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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