The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
