How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
