"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
