we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
