I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize