This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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