I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
