it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
That accounts for only three of the penises
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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