what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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