I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Randomize
