Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
