dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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