she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
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