Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
