I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
