normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Randomize
