you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
