please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
