i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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