brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
