Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
