I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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