I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
