Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
