What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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