the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
