addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
