you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Randomize
