I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
