well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
