I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
