found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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