I puked a lego.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize