We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
