And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
