oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
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