Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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