No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
birth control should be required to get into college
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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