so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
