yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
