Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
