dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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