How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
