For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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