Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
