is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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